wedding articles

Reception Etiquette

Speeches and Toasts

To some, making a toast or speech, can be the most dreaded part of a wedding. Many books and websites offer tips on wedding speeches and toasts. Most of them differ on who should give a toast and/or speech and in what order they should proceed. Here are some of the information we’ve compiled.

When?

One aspect many guests always complain about at a wedding, is the length of the speeches. Guests don’t mind hearing speeches and toasts…but when they start to drag on for hours, they tend to get very boring. The best advice we’ve seen so far is to interlace the speeches and toasts throughout the dinner.

Who Makes the Speeches and Toasts?

The best man, brides father, and wedding couple are persons that should make a speech or toast, the best man being the one to call upon the brides father first. The order of the toasts and speeches is up to you but here is an order we’ve compiled that you may choose to follow:

  • best man should begin by welcoming everyone and calling upon the brides father to propose a toast of 'health and happiness to the bride and groom. 

  • brides father (or both parents)  welcomes the grooms parents, relatives of both families, any other guests, he welcomes the groom to his family, and says a few words about his daughter.

  • grooms father (or both parents) toast the uniting of both families. They may also extend a welcome to all the guests and thank anyone for their help and contribution. They may also say a couple words about the bride and groom.

  • best man, should then respond with a toast to the couple on behalf of the bridesmaids and ushers. He should also toast to the bridesmaids. His speech should be lighthearted and fun.

  • maid of honor, toasts the bride and groom and the groomsmen on behalf of the bridesmaids.

  • groom, replies on behalf of himself and his bride. This is the opportune time to thank his parents for their love and care during his youth, for the start they gave him in life, and for their good wishes for his future and that of his wife. This is also the time, on behalf of his wife and himself, to thank all those present for their gifts.

    If there are any family members that could not attend the wedding because of illness, may be mentioned and wished a fast recovery.
    To conclude, the groom will propose the toast to the bridesmaids, and thank them for a job well done, if not already done at the rehearsal dinner, he may also present them with a small gift as a token of their appreciation.

  • bride alongside with the groom may make a toast and speech if she wishes to.  She can toast the groom, bridesmaids, and both sets of parents.

  • anyone else that would like to make a toast or speech should now be welcomed to the podium. A small reminder by the master of ceremonies or best man to keep the toasts and speeches short so others can have a say would be a good tip.

How long should the speeches be?

If you’re having more than 5 speeches, ask everyone to keep the speeches and toasts down to 2 or 3 minutes. This will give everyone a chance to speak and will not make this a whole night event.

Follow up article: Tips to Help Prepare for Speeches and Toasts

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